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June 08, 2004
Note to Ted Rall


I saw what you had to say about Pat Tillman. I have read what you wrote with regard to the late President.

I have seen entirely too much of you. I suspect I am not alone in this assessment.

You should consider yourself fortunate in two respects you may not have previously been aware of:

  1. As I live nowhere near any place you might frequent, the odds of me encountering you in the street are vanishingly small.

  2. I have no idea what you look like.
Were I to encounter and recognize you, the remainder of your sojourn on this earth would be measurable in seconds, not minutes.

I would cheerfully snap your twig-like neck, and spit in your face as you struggle and fail to draw your last breath while the world goes forever dark before your eyes.

If you were to show up at my front door with an angry mob at your heels, I would let you in - so that I could do the mob's work for them.

But I don't hate you Ted.

That may be a difficult concept for you to grasp. As full of hate as you are, you probably cannot imagine that other people don't perpetually seethe. You drown in your own bile every day and you don't even know that, inside, you are as dead as the last Dodo.

I hold you in contempt. I despise your works. I revile your beliefs and until my dying day will work to defeat them.

But I don't hate you. No.

I pity you.

I pity you as I would pity any poor, dumb animal that were sick or injured, mindlessly hurting itself and all others around it.

As with a rabid dog that simultaneously suffers, and endangers others, I would be inclined to put you down with hardly a second thought.

And if it were ever to happen thus, and I were called to account for it, I would suffer my punishment gladly, knowing I had put a pathetic, wretched creature out of its — and our — misery.

But it'll never happen - see items 1 and 2 above.

Get some psychiatric help, Ted. It can't hurt, it might do some good, and if nothing else, the hours you spend with a competent psychiatric professional will be hours in which you do no harm.

I think this is what is meant by a "Red Curtain of Blood" moment. I'd be tempted, but no, I wouldn't actually harm Ted. Not permanently, anyway. But the rest of what I say stands.

As an exercise in catharsis, this has been quite ameliorative. I'm feeling much better now.

Posted by Russ at 07:37 AM, June 8, 2004 in Idiots & Memoranda

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Reply to Ted Rall (TacJammer) from Dummocrats.com
Reply to Ted Rall (TacJammer) [Read More]

Tracked on June 8, 2004 10:27 AM

Diminishing A Legacy from BLACKFIVE
John Hawkins at Right Wing News has a post about the media taking pot shots at Ronald Reagan before he's even in the ground. Pawatwoop sent me the Ted Rall blog piece about Reagan. Ted Rall has the innate ability [Read More]

Tracked on June 8, 2004 10:39 AM

Nicely Put from The Anti-Idiotarian Rottweiler
Some of you might wonder why I haven't bothered to comment on Ted Rrrralllphhh's latest outburst about the Gipper. Well,... [Read More]

Tracked on June 8, 2004 11:46 PM

Ted Rall is a Terrible Person. from INCITE
Discuss. Trackback seems to think my excerpt is insufficiently long. But that's all there is to it. [Read More]

Tracked on June 9, 2004 01:57 AM

Two Other Opinions from Ted Rall Is Full Of Crap
Russ Emerson goes a little bit too far in the threats. Bastard Sword backs up Russ Emerson. Down here in Texas, we tend to wish people unwell by omission. As in "I wouldn't piss in your mouth if your guts... [Read More]

Tracked on June 9, 2004 11:48 AM

RCOB from Inoperable Terran
Russ Emerson ain't hiding his feelings about Ted Rall.... [Read More]

Tracked on June 10, 2004 05:39 PM

Two Other Opinions from Ted Rall Is Full Of Crap
Russ Emerson goes a little bit too far in the threats. Bastard Sword backs up Russ Emerson. Down here in Texas, we tend to wish people unwell by omission. As in "I wouldn't piss in your mouth if your guts... [Read More]

Tracked on June 28, 2004 10:16 AM



Posted by: Aaron at June 8, 2004 09:29 AM

Well said Russ. I never heard of Ted Rall until his tasteless cartoon about Pat Tillman. Rall is typical of the rude and spiteful little beasts that seem to populate the extreme left these days. Rall, and others like him, aren't good enough to carry the Gipper's or Tillman's jock strap. His punishmment is a life sentence of having to be Ted Rall (pretty harsh, but well deserved).

Posted by: Noble Eagle at June 8, 2004 11:07 AM

Well said.

Posted by: Dick at June 8, 2004 06:51 PM

I'm sorry, but I disagree.

A rabid dog usually has become so because it was bitten by another, previously rabid dog, bat, what have you. It's an innocent victim.

Ted Rall is what he is because of his own choices, his own thoughts, his own heart.

While I don't hate the man either, I also can't find it in my heart to stir up even a meager portion of pity.

Posted by: Brian B at June 8, 2004 08:47 PM

Nice going. I do so wish that he would go live elsewhere.

Posted by: Jim - Parkway Rest Stop at June 8, 2004 10:17 PM

Someone else came up with this first, but if there's a Hell, Ted Rall will spend eternity breathing Michael Moore's farts.

Posted by: zetetic at June 8, 2004 11:55 PM

i myself do hate r-ll. the f***** gets under my skin, and that pisses me off even more, because aside from making a name for himself, that's his primary goal. he's taken the merry prankster role and twisted it to a vile obscene extreme.

anything i did to r-ll if we met would be done out of hate and rage. but, like you, i would proudly accept the consequences of my act. the worst living american i'm aware of.

Posted by: ansar at June 9, 2004 12:00 AM

everyone: this is what he looks like:


for novelty puposes only, of course.

Posted by: ansar at June 9, 2004 12:05 AM

Ted Rall ...well it does not surprise me that in his e-mail guide lines he says he does not listen to criticism, if he did, he just might get smart, and we know smart is not what he is, he is out to make a name for himself as a sales man of rightwingnuttyness, a loud blood sucking Tick on society, do not attack him, do not even mail him, but please mail the asshats that support and publish his works, let them know that anti-American rhetoric either in writting or a cartoon (from a cartoonish clown asshat) is not to be tolorated, find out who advertises with the asshats that publish this crap tell them how u feel, let them know that because they support this we can no longer support them...dang..sorry but I am mad

Sir Knight

Posted by: Sir Knight at June 9, 2004 02:08 AM

It's like this:

1. Rall writes or scribbles something obscene and offensive for the sole purpose of pissing people off and getting his name and link on Drudge.

2. Rall then whines about all the hate mail and death threats he's getting from those right-wing hatemongers in reaction to his scribbling - even though the angry reaction was what he was shooting for in the first place.

3. Rall plays the victim, and accuses everyone else of overreacting. He only wanted to inform and educate us morons, you see. There's a thing called the First Amendment, you know! Look it up!

It's a familiar pattern. When you can't get positive recognition for your achievements, then you shoot for negative attention through shock tactics. I used to be the same way, back in junior high school.

Writing him hate mail and death threats only turns him on. Best thing to do is simply ignore him and he'll go away.

Posted by: Larry at June 9, 2004 02:30 AM

Just stuff Ted in a Russian rocket and send him into space, let the aliens find new ways to put an end it him.

Posted by: UZI4U at June 9, 2004 02:55 AM

What Would Ronald Reagan Do?
Disarm with humor.
Ignore him.
Get the real work done.

Take comfort in this: After Ted Rall's last breath there will be no 11 hour lines to pay respects. No tears. Little more than a passing mention in the news - if that. With in a year he will be forgotten.

Posted by: Noctoe at June 9, 2004 08:43 AM

Hannity played into Rall's hands. To fight Rall, expose the falsity of his claims, a falsity he camoflages with outrageous statements as a small boy will say kaka just to shock.
Rall is factually deficient.

Posted by: Walter E. Wallis at June 9, 2004 10:22 AM

Concur yr analysis.

Rall is a poopoo-head. Shock value. What is ugly and shocking that I can say about "Fillin D. Blanque"?

His sickness is manifest, sad and self-inflicted.

Not to mention, Rall shows himself to be mean, petty, small and cheap, right alongside gutless and immature.

Posted by: SharpShooter at June 9, 2004 10:54 AM

Well Said!
I wonder if Mr. Rall would be willing to Join Alec Baldwin and the rest of the 'Left Coast' Liberal community that swore they would move out of the country if Mr Bush were elected president (remember that?) I wonder if we could start collecting funds to send his sorry butt to France, where he belongs! or better yet, send him to Syria!

Posted by: Gator77 at June 9, 2004 11:27 AM

Rall concludes his hate-Reagan piece with this bit of nonsense;

[Based on intelligence as phony as that floated to justify the war against Iraq, Reagan bombed Muslim Libya.]

With so many 1st class hate-America idiotarians like Rallph repeating this utterly fictional, fabricated, historical revisionism (masquerading as an indictment of Reagan), its no wonder a villain like Kaddafi had the temerity to climb up on his hind legs and spew venom at our beloved President's passing.

Naturally it was all "phony" intelligence that manipulated the German judiciary into convicting Libyan secret service agents in the La Belle disco bombing;

... and then compelled Kaddafi to offer compensation to the victims of the La Belle disco bombing.

Rallph misses the mark, again. [badly]

Posted by: R DeFrank at June 9, 2004 11:52 AM

I had the privilege of seeing Shawn Hannity give it to Ted Rall last night although I was watching Five Days to Midnight and just looking at Fox News during the commercials. Ted Rall is a little tick of a man compared to the men he attacks. Ronald Reagan is so great a man compared to the sorry Rall that it makes him invisible by comparison. Rall builds himself up by tearing others down, and can only be a miserable, bitter, little shit of a person, sorry, can't call him a man at all. God bless Ronald Reagan and God judge Ted Rall for the person he is.

Posted by: Johnboy at June 9, 2004 12:03 PM

Rall is an Asswipe. He doesn't rate being an Asshat. He not worth a pimple on Ronald Reagan's ass

Posted by: Harry O at June 9, 2004 02:37 PM

Rall is a prissy, pissy, bitchy little man. My wife had never heard of him and saw him on Hannity & Colmes for the first time last night. She generally attempts to understand someone else's point of view. She was absoulutely appalled at Rall. He isn't worth the energy. He isn't going to change anyone's mind. Ignore him and let him rot in his own juices.

Posted by: HeartFeltHeart at June 9, 2004 03:17 PM

Tried to go to see Rall's pic - the website is turned off!


He is spineless.

God Bless the Gipper


Posted by: VaTech_Smitty at June 9, 2004 03:49 PM

What Would Ronald Reagan Do?
Disarm with humor.
Ignore him.
Get the real work done.

Right on, Noctoe. The more attention you give these smacktards, the more poinant they believe they are. Be like Reagan, ignore those who don't matter and go about taking care of what's important.

Posted by: Grub at June 9, 2004 09:55 PM

Click on my name to see if you can guess who I wrote about.

Ted is all about free speech until someone uses it to make fun of him. Ask Danny Hellman, a.k.a. Dirty Danny.


Posted by: Cap'n Yoaz at June 9, 2004 09:59 PM

As a liberal I was opposed to Ronald Reagan's policies even though I thought he had good intentions, but to trash a President who is waiting in State... Well I'll stick to picking on the Shrub as he can still defend himself. Somehow it just doesn't seem fair to pick a fight with a dead President. And when Bush dies someday, I'll pick on some other elephant who's still alive and kicking.

Posted by: Yellow Dog '04 at June 9, 2004 11:22 PM

Unfortunately, #2 no longer applies to me. After watching the twerp try to fend off well-deserved abuse from both Hannity and Colmes, I know exactly what he looks like. Fortunately for both him and me, #1 still holds, so the likelihood of me encountering him anywhere is next to nil.

Posted by: Xrlq at June 10, 2004 02:51 PM

I completely missed his appearance on H&C. Good thing, too -- undoubtedly the RCOB would have descended before my eyes the moment he opened his mouth, and I'd have thrown a brick (or similarly dense object) at my TV.

I like my TV. I don't want to hurt it.

Posted by: Russ at June 10, 2004 04:55 PM

I saw it and the RCOB descended. It was so bad that I didn't dare catch the rerun of the show later.

It's not often that Hannity and Colmes agree on something, but this was one of those times. I'd like to think that they both cornered him in an elevator after the show and pummeled the shit out of him, but that's wishful thinking. They have too much to lose. I wish I had been in the elevator. I have nothing to lose.

Posted by: StinKerr at June 10, 2004 07:07 PM

as soon as i saw r-ll on h&c i new colmes would tear into him, he's good like that, but they shouldn't have had him at all. and i encourage all of you to henceforth spell his name r-ll. transform this bitch into "he that cannot be googled".

Posted by: ansar at June 10, 2004 11:02 PM