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June 03, 2005
They Hurt Buddy!

I have been completely and deliberately ignorant of the news coverage of the Michael Jackson trial. I simply don't care about the day-to-day coverage of the trial. I figure if he isn't found guilty, he's still screwy enough to be institutionalized. The word "whacko" might well have been created specifically to be applied to him.

What has irked me about the little coverage I have been unable to avoid is the constant presence of shrilly screaming fans every time Jackson makes a court appearance. Do any of them understand the seriousness of what Jackson is on trial for? He [allegedly] molested little boys.

Do these people have nothing better to do than to wait outside the building, behind a cordon, at a considerable distance from where the principal players in this melodrama make their transition from limo to courthouse door, hoping for a fleeting glimpse of the pervert they idolize?

I guess that question pretty much answers itself, no?

What exactly is this mob of latter-day teeny-boppers going to do if/when Jackson is found guilty? Riot?

Now there's a thought that gives me chills. Rampaging mobs of tearful teenage girls, wailing, pulling out their hair, pounding their little fists ineffectually against whatever solid object is nearest to hand. I do not envision overturned and burning police cars. Rather, the mental image I get is more on the order of the brawling dancers towards the end of Blazing Saddles....

Throw out your hands
Stick out your tush
Hands on your hips
Give 'em a push
You'll be surprised
You're doing the French Mistake!

Followed shortly thereafter by "They hurt Buddy! Let's get 'em, girls!"

I figure a pack of Cub Scouts could handle the Jackson-fan riot-control duties... though it might be exceptionally unwise to have a pack of Cub Scouts anywhere within several miles of Michael Jackson, if you know what I mean.

Stupid fans.

[Update, 13 Jun 05: Yo, OTB. OK, OK, so this isn't a new post, but it's on topic for today.]

Posted by Russ at 12:08 PM, June 3, 2005 in Idiots & News

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If he's found guilty? They simply won't believe he is guilty. He's a victim, it's because he's a successful Black man (I've already heard that one a few times), that he was railroaded. One or all of the above :)

Posted by: Ith at June 3, 2005 12:43 PM

Good point. The self-delusion capacity of the teeny-boppers shouldn't be underestimated.

Posted by: Russ at June 3, 2005 12:47 PM